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-Sh1Ft

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My job is so fucking unbelievable.
I'll try to sum it up by first telling you about the folks I work with:
First, there is this supermodel wanna-be chick. Yeah, okay, she is pretty hot, but damn is she completely useless. The girl is constantly fixing her hair or putting on makeup. She is extremely self-centered and has never once considered the needs or wants of anyone but herself. She is as dumb as a box of rocks, and I still find it surprising that she has enough brain power to continue to breathe.
The next chick is completely the opposite. She might even be one of the smartest people on the planet. Her career opportunities are endless, and yet she is here with us. She is a zero on a scale of 1 to 10. I'm not sure she even showers, much less shaves her "womanly" parts. I think she might be a lesbian, because every time we drive by the hardware store, she moans like a cat in heat.
But the jewel of the crowd has got to be the fucking stoner. And this guy is more than just your average pothead. In fact, he is baked before he comes to work, during work, and I'm sure after work. He probably hasn't been sober anytime in the last ten years, and he's only 22. He dresses like a beatnik throwback from the 1960's, and to make things worse, he brings his big fucking dog to work. Every fucking day I have to look at this huge Great Dane walk around half-stoned from the second-hand smoke. Hell, sometimes I even think it's trying to talk with its constant bellowing. Also, both of them are constantly hungry, requiring multiple stops to McDonalds and Burger King, every single fucking day.
Anyway, I drive these fucktards around in my van and we solve mysteries and shit.

Achievements

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Game		#	Unlocked achievements				Locked achievements
			Current best	#	Points	%	Next easiest	#	Points	%
	7 Days to Die	43	-1	0	0.00	0	0.2320686579	43	32.82	100
	Alan Wake's American Nightmare	12	0.6848042607	2	1.32	16.7	0.8425558209	10	12.57	83.3
	Aliens vs. Predator	50	1.0123424530	4	2.69	8	0.3947948813	46	45.27	92
	Arma 3	47	0.4814534783	4	1.22	8.5	0.2230028659	43	58.78	91.5
	Batman: Arkham Asylum GOTY Edition	47	0.4939436913	8	3.25	17	0.4366290569	39	33.14	83
	Batman: Arkham City GOTY	64	0.4505053461	6	2.37	9.4	0.5083017349	58	60.72	90.6
	BattleBlock Theater	30	0.5053242445	6	1.79	20	0.2653826773	24	23.77	80
	BioShock 2	60	-1	0	0.00	0	0.8265004754	60	86.75	100
	BioShock Infinite	50	0.1870630383	1	0.19	2	0.2472117692	49	32.81	98
	Borderlands 2	50	0.2924996912	11	2.20	22	0.2443771511	39	24.85	78
	The Bureau: XCOM Declassified	34	0.6734681726	1	0.67	2.9	0.7270245552	33	40.13	97.1
	Call of Duty: Advanced Warfare - Multiplayer	45	-1	0	0.00	0	1.0496464968	45	79.96	100
	Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 2 (2009)	50	0.3697848320	11	2.24	22	0.2617421150	39	24.16	78
	Castle Crashers	12	-1	0	0.00	0	0.3043452203	12	11.45	100
	Children of the Nile	16	-1	0	0.00	0	1.3343646526	16	28.42	100
	Children of the Nile: Alexandria	4	-1	0	0.00	0	1.5474321842	4	6.67	100
	Chivalry: Medieval Warfare	49	1.8324623108	33	36.63	67.3	1.0651127100	16	23.57	32.7
	Contagion	165	1.4057615995	4	3.65	2.4	0.6679069996	161	446.67	97.6
	Counter-Strike: Source	147	1.2180663347	74	38.85	50.3	0.4351864457	73	82.24	49.7
	Crusader Kings II	32	-1	0	0.00	0	0.9777572155	32	52.54	100
	DARK SOULS™: Prepare To Die Edition	41	-1	0	0.00	0	0.2318639606	41	32.98	100
	The Darkness II	50	1.1967760324	4	3.23	8	0.6294248700	46	49.47	92
	Darksiders II	50	0.4979526997	4	1.85	12	0.5453993678	46-2	47.94	88
	DayZ	13	-1	0	0.00	0	0.8340062499	13	20.81	100
	Dead Island	48	0.9097579718	2	1.31	4.2	0.2861704826	46	35.00	95.8
	Dead Island: Epidemic	54	0.5281724334	2	0.98	100	0.7036750913	52-52	89.58	0
	DEFCON	22	-1	0	0.00	0	0.6873191595	22	40.54	100
	Deus Ex: Human Revolution - Director's Cut	59	1.1128011942	21	14.24	35.6	0.6807475686	38	37.35	64.4
	Dungeon Defenders	78	-1	0	0.00	0	0.3351148963	78	106.88	100
	E.Y.E: Divine Cybermancy	100	-1	0	0.00	0	0.3002724648	100	145.04	100
	The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim	50	0.5925242305	30	10.00	60	0.3268885016	20	11.72	40
	Empires	8	-1	0	0.00	0	1.1311026812	8	11.32	100
	Europa Universalis IV	190	-1	0	0.00	0	0.5321054459	190	300.17	100
	F.E.A.R. 3	50	0.8794074059	9	6.42	18	0.7925568819	41	65.27	82
	Fallout: New Vegas	50	1.0720506907	9	4.86	18	0.3792877793	41	34.88	82
	Fallout New Vegas: Dead Money	5	-1	0	0.00	0	0.5497167706	5	3.18	100
	Fallout New Vegas: Honest Hearts	5	-1	0	0.00	0	0.5936350822	5	3.53	100
	Fallout New Vegas®: Gun Runners’ Arsenal™	5	0.0644150749	1	0.06	20	0.1331932396	4	2.06	80
	Fistful of Frags	20	0.5690577030	2	0.78	10	0.7316662073	18	27.31	90
	Garry's Mod	29	0.7013501525	7	1.99	24.1	0.5564569831	22	24.54	75.9
	Gauntlet™	43	0.4401327372	2	0.70	4.7	0.3298459053	41	56.97	95.3
	Grand Theft Auto IV: The Complete Edition	55	-1	0	0.00	0	0.6794215441	55	81.60	100
	Guns of Icarus Online	849	-1	0	0.00	0	0.4942943156	849	2526.12	100
	Hitman: Absolution	47	0.8760597110	23	9.42	66	0.4058618546	24-8	21.66	34
	Insurgency	100	1.2337294817	14	10.65	14	0.8314976096	86	132.78	86
	Insurgency: Modern Infantry Combat	1	-1	0	0.00	100	2.1331760883	1-1	2.13	100
	Just Cause 2	50	0.1904474646	1	0.19	2	0.2316162288	49	49.63	98
	Killing Floor	285	1.4049414396	30	20.45	10.9	0.4487807453	255-1	340.85	89.1
	Killing Floor Mod: Defence Alliance 2	30	-1	0	0.00	0	2.6682953835	30	81.22	100
	Left 4 Dead 2	101	0.6652239561	7	2.36	6.9	0.3097051978	94	100.03	93.1
	The Lord of the Rings: War in the North	46	0.7036482692	8	4.62	17.4	0.7002574205	38	41.01	82.6
	Max Payne 3	46	0.7085031867	1	0.71	2.2	0.3143739998	45	47.21	97.8
	Metro 2033	48	-1	0	0.00	0	0.3579573035	48	57.65	100
	Mortal Kombat Komplete Edition	50	0.6013678908	4	1.62	8	0.4909709394	46	60.08	92
	Mount & Blade: Warband	80	1.1722177267	34	22.50	42.5	0.4888174236	46	48.14	57.5
	Mount Your Friends	8	-1	0	0.00	0	1.5384200811	8	13.36	100
	Multiwinia	12	-1	0	0.00	16.7	1.3643597364	12-2	27.53	100
	Natural Selection 2	137	-1	0	0.00	0	1.1026161909	137	380.77	100
	Nosgoth	80	-1	0	0.00	0	0.7869131565	80	177.65	100
	Painkiller Hell & Damnation	67	-1	0	0.00	0	0.5027268529	67	88.97	100
	Papers, Please	13	0.4669678509	1	0.47	7.7	0.3369922936	12	9.87	92.3
	PAYDAY 2	715	0.8116700053	26	10.97	3.6	0.2187378407	689	845.26	96.4
	PAYDAY 2: Armored Transport	48	0.1633953452	1	0.16	2.1	0.2073751241	47	27.06	97.9
	PAYDAY 2: Gage Weapon Pack #02	10	0.0070073237	1	0.01	10	0.5236018300	9	6.08	90
	PAYDAY 2: The Big Bank Heist	20	0.1673249453	3	0.38	15	0.2402278483	17	9.36	85
	PAYDAY 2: The Charlie Santa Heist	15	0.2951458991	1	0.30	6.7	0.1882568747	14	6.12	93.3
	PAYDAY 2: The Death Wish Update	31	0.1114263535	1	0.11	3.2	0.2482600063	30	16.11	96.8
	Pirates Vikings & Knights II	294	-1	0	0.00	0	0.6081805825	294	399.87	100
	Planetary Annihilation	19	-1	0	0.00	0	1.0938923359	19	32.58	100
	Prison Architect	18	-1	0	0.00	0	0.6040037870	18	22.49	100
	Red Faction: Armageddon	48	0.8145490885	5	3.55	10.4	0.8621594310	43	55.73	89.6
	Red Orchestra 2: Heroes of Stalingrad - Single Player	29	0.8231281042	1	0.82	3.4	1.0882656574	28	45.13	96.6
	Rising Storm/Red Orchestra 2 Multiplayer	140	1.5450483561	27	26.99	35.7	0.9529064894	113-23	231.26	64.3
	Scribblenauts Unlimited	25	-1	0	0.00	0	0.3233221173	25	20.97	100
	Sid Meier's Civilization V	118	1.2332428694	41	20.26	34.7	0.4177694023	77	91.80	65.3
	Sid Meier's Civilization V: Brave New World	60	1.2337790728	9	7.10	15	0.5914404988	51	67.62	85
	Sid Meier's Civilization V: Gods and Kings	51	0.3619399071	7	1.26	13.7	0.2357573062	44	58.94	86.3
	Sins of a Solar Empire: Rebellion	63	1.3573759794	14	14.36	22.2	1.0143203735	49	76.04	77.8
	Sniper Elite: Nazi Zombie Army 2	36	1.0678557158	14	10.55	38.9	0.4142031372	22	22.58	61.1
	Space Engineers	29	-1	0	0.00	0	0.5484752059	29	47.56	100
	Spec Ops: The Line	50	0.9232113361	14	7.40	28	0.5347666144	36	28.63	72
	SpeedRunners	29	0.2858188748	2	0.56	6.9	0.3630636334	27	25.91	93.1
	Starpoint Gemini 2	52	-1	0	0.00	0	1.0498069525	52	95.97	100
	Team Fortress 2	520	0.8595364094	84	34.56	16.9	0.2835721970	436-4	322.43	83.1
	Tomb Raider	50	0.5591350794	14	6.47	28	0.4707708359	36	39.66	72
	Torchlight II	119	1.0210450888	10	3.48	8.4	0.1384786218	109	92.78	91.6
	Total War: EMPIRE - Definitive Edition	30	1.4175529480	5	4.40	16.7	1.0234081745	25	37.92	83.3
	Total War: SHOGUN 2	106	1.6433006525	18	17.86	17	0.9506489038	88	148.67	83
	Tropico 4	60	-1	0	0.00	0	0.6587717533	60	74.04	100
	Verdun	59	0.5278020501	1	0.53	1.7	0.4753029346	58	95.10	98.3
	Viscera Cleanup Detail	65	-1	0	0.00	0	0.4031039178	65	80.75	100
	Viscera Cleanup Detail: Santa's Rampage	13	-1	0	0.00	0	0.5637763143	13	13.08	100
	Viscera Cleanup Detail: Shadow Warrior	2	-1	0	0.00	0	1.1071040630	2	2.30	100
	Warface: Clutch	67	-1	0	0.00	0	1.0170887709	67	169.22	100
	Wargame: European Escalation	29	0.6000068188	1	0.60	3.4	0.7809259892	28	44.48	96.6
	The Witcher 2: Assassins of Kings Enhanced Edition	52	-1	0	0.00	0	0.3370138407	52	46.15	100
	Wolfenstein: The New Order	50	0.4420791268	19	5.38	38	0.2231859118	31	23.76	62
	World of Guns: Gun Disassembly	42	0.3019835353	4	0.97	9.5	0.4167071581	38	48.99	90.5
	X3: Terran Conflict	33	-1	0	0.00	0	0.8475557566	33	66.07	100

Beta games

Game		#	Unlocked achievements				Locked achievements
			Current best	#	Points	%	Next easiest	#	Points	%
	Patch testing for Chivalry	50	-1	0	0.00	0	2.5314714909	50	146.07	100
	Red Orchestra 2: Heroes of Stalingrad Beta	81	-1	0	0.00	0	1.7310333252	81	126.92	100
	Rising Storm Beta	111	-1	0	0.00	100	0.9913548231	111-111	249.57	100

Profile was last updated on December 15, 2014 at 11:30 PM.

Next automatic update on October 20, 2026 at 11:18 PM.